Two roads diverged in a wood, and I took the one less traveled. It hurt like hell. – Robert Frost, except for the last part
In October of 2013, I was out for a night run. I didn’t leave the office that day until after 7pm. When I run, I usually listen to music. I was feeling good on this night; stronger than usual. I had a pace that was a little quicker than normal. A couple of weeks earlier, my daughter had just finished her last chemo treatment. Two and half years of chemo had finally come to an end. Life was returning to normal.
I had just passed the Twin Falls High School on my run, when a familiar song came on. I had heard the song many times before, but on this night, I connected with the song’s lyrics like never before. As I trotted along, every word of the lyrics seemed to speak directly to me; to my heart. Although the song was written in 2004, it was as if the two guys that wrote it did so with the 2013 version of Chris Pruitt in mind. When the song finished playing, I stopped running and Googled the lyrics. I wanted to read them. The parking lot at the Twin Falls High School has a short pipe fence that runs around the perimeter. I sat on the pipe fence and read the lyrics on my smartphone three or four times. I finished my run that night thinking about those lyrics. Later that evening as I laid down to go to sleep, I made the decision to adopt these lyrics as a road map for my life. Here they are:
He said
“I was in my early forties
With a lot of life before me
And a moment came that stopped me on a dime
I spent most of the next days
Looking at the x-rays
Talkin’ ’bout the options
And talkin’ ’bout sweet time”
I asked him
“When it sank in
That this might really be the real end
How’s it hit you
When you get that kind of news?
Man, what’d you do?”
He said
“I went skydiving
I went Rocky Mountain climbing
I went 2.7 seconds on a bull named Fumanchu
And I loved deeper
And I spoke sweeter
And I gave forgiveness I’d been denying”
And he said
“Someday I hope you get the chance
To live like you were dying”
He said
“I was finally the husband
That most of the time I wasn’t
And I became a friend a friend would like to have
And all of a sudden going fishin’
Wasn’t such an imposition
And I went three times that year I lost my dad
I finally read the Good Book, and I
Took a good, long, hard look
At what I’d do if I could do it all again
And then
I went skydiving
I went Rocky Mountain climbing
I went 2.7 seconds on a bull named Fumanchu
And I loved deeper
And I spoke sweeter
And I gave forgiveness I’d been denying”
And he said
“Someday I hope you get the chance
To live like you were dying
Like tomorrow was a gift
And you’ve got eternity
To think about
What you’d do with it
What could you do with it
What did I do with it?
What would I do with it?
If you’re familiar with country music, then you recognize these lyrics as being from Tim McGraw’s song Live Like You Were Dying (link to song). The two men who wrote the song did so with a friend in mind who had recently be misdiagnosed with cancer. The message I take away from this song is that we shouldn’t wait until it’s almost too late to do the things we’ve always wanted to do, and to be the person we’ve always wanted to be. Choose today to live like you were dying because the reality is that we are all going to die. As they say, no one’s getting out of here alive. The only unknown is when.
Until right now, I’ve never told anyone about the significance this song played in what I call the redesign of my life. If you know my story, then you know I had a lot happen in my life in 2011 and 2012. Those were the dark years. The week before Memorial Day in 2011 was when my daughter, Ellie, was diagnosed with Lymphoma. Then in July of 2012, my boss and friend, Geoff Neuhoff, died on my birthday. These two events gave me a deeper understanding and appreciation for health and life.
Since the night of my connection with this song, I’ve literally and figuratively tried to live all parts of this song that I can. I’ve skydived, read the Bible cover to cover, climbed mountains, made many apologies to people from my past, tried to be a better friend, went fishin’, loved deeper, spoke sweeter and this past Sunday I went about 2.7 seconds on a 1200-pound bull I named Dial 91.
By far, the scariest thing I have ever intentionally done in my life is ride a bull. Up until this point, I thought skydiving was scary. Using a fear scale from 1 to 10, skydiving would be about a 7 and riding a bull was about a 27. I am not exaggerating.
On Memorial Day Weekend 2017, I attended the Sankey Rodeo School in New Camey, Texas. New Camey is a suburb of Houston. The Sankey Rodeo School is a traveling 3-day rodeo camp for those aspiring to make a living rodeoing.
If you know me, or read any of my writings, then you probably know about The List. If you don’t, well here is a link to get you in the know www.BMFAdventureClub.com/The-List . Riding a Bull was on The List when I originally penned it back in 2013. In fact, prior to my visit to the Sankey Rodeo School, “Ride a Bull” and “Photograph the Milky Way Galaxy” are the last two items remaining from that original list.
At Christmas, I made the decision to go ahead and tackle riding a bull. I started my quest to ride a bull where I usually start when I’m trying to learn something new; You Tube. There are tons of instructional videos about bull riding. Quickly, I discovered that bull riding is an incredibly dangerous sport and that I was going to need to hire professional help if I want to do it right, and not kill myself.
If you Google Bull Riding Schools, the first result that pops up is for Sankey Rodeo Schools. It didn’t take me long to make the decision that Sankey was the best school. Their online schedule showed a stop in Texas on Memorial Day Weekend. I found some interesting irony here in that Memorial Day Weekend was really the beginning of Ellie’s battle against cancer. I also needed some time to train as bull riding requires a ton of arm and core strength and I had little.
I didn’t immediately book my spot in the class. It’s a 3-day class and my schedule stays packed. Over the next few months I would check back to their website just to make sure the class I wanted was still on the schedule. I was at my house in Idaho at the beginning of May, when I made the final decision to commit. The cost of the class was $440. Like I do with a lot of my adventures, I kept the details to myself.
As the Memorial Day weekend inched closer, my anxiety over what I was about to do increased. To prepare for the class, I had to do was buy a pair of boots that would take a spur. I don’t wear boots; At least not cowboy boots. I have a pair of boots I was given a few years back, but the instructions from the rodeo school said the type of boots I have, Ropers, would not take a spur. The weekend before the class I was in Austin, so I went over to a well-known boot store, Allen’s Boots. When I walked in, a young man greeted me at the door. I told him I was needing a boot that would take a spur. He seemed to know exactly what I needed, or so I thought. As we walked down the aisle, he asked me a few more questions about the specific type of the boot I was seeking. Quickly, he knew I had no clue what I was looking for so he asked, “What do you intend to use the boot for?” Okay, let’s pause. When you’re a 50-year old, fat, bald guy, the last thing you want to do is answer any question with a response of, “I’m going to ride a bull.” Why? Because people will think you’re crazy. Since I had no other choice I replied, “I’m going to ride a bull.” On cue, the guy said, “Are you crazy!” Since I get this a lot, I came back with my standard, well-timed and rehearsed response of, “Not according to the doctor at my last trial.” This response usually leads to a laugh or kills the conversation immediately depending on my delivery. Within 10-minutes, I had selected a pair of very nice black boots and I was headed back to Waco.
The week before the school, I had some of the strangest things happen. It seemed like everywhere I turned, something related to riding a bull crossed my path. The Wednesday before the school, construction workers who were working in our building had a radio playing in the hall outside of my office. I had stepped over into what we call the Traffic Office when Live Like You Were Dying came on. I always wonder if these omens that the Universe tosses out there are meant to encourage or warn me.
5:45pm on Friday, May 27th. Go time! The plan was to drive down to Houston on Friday, since the class started on Saturday morning at 8am.
I got to Houston at about 9pm that night. I stayed at a hotel by the airport. That night I walked over to the Subway next door to my hotel for dinner. As I walked, I thought about the adventure I would face the next couple of days. This is probably as good a point as any to say that I way underestimated the amount of fear I would face when riding a bull. I got my dinner, took it back to the hotel, ate it, and turned in early because the next morning I wanted to be refreshed and ready to go.
I got up about 6am. I showered, got dressed and grabbed something to eat as I left the hotel. I arrived at the school about 7:40am. As I said, New Camey is a small town just outside of Houston. The school was being held at a very nice covered rodeo arena. I parked and walked up to a spot where people were gathering. I made my way over to the crowd and quickly began a conversation and made some friends. Within about 20-minutes of arriving, young guys were coming over introducing themselves to me. I think they just wanted to check out the old guy. I heard one kid that looked to be about 12 or 13 tell his dad, “Look, that old man is doing it!” That made me laugh. About then, one of the instructors came over and started giving instructions. Class was now in session.
The school that was being taught on this day is what’s called Rough Stock. This consisted of Bronc Riding, Bull Riding and Bullfighting. As I said, most everyone there was young. The total class size was close to 50. There was one guy in his 30’s and another guy that was 49-years old. His name was Carlos and he lives in Austin. He used to ride bulls when he was in his twenties. He was attending the school to ride one more time.
We split up into groups depending on our chosen discipline. The bull riding group had over 30 people. The broncs had about a dozen students, and the bullfighting had about 5. Once we were segregated, they issued us equipment and checked us in. I have been involved in sporting events and activities that required signing a personal release of liability, but the “death waiver” for this rodeo school was different. It required a notarized signature. This was my first clue that I was in way over my head.
After getting our gear, we ran through introductions, a quick synopsis of the school, a few rules, and then jumped right into learning the art of riding bulls. Step one was learning the name and use of our bull riding gear. Step two was getting our spurs fitted to our boots. Getting your spurs to fit your boot correctly is no easy chore. When we were done with that, we hopped up on some bull riding simulators. The back of these simulators was about 5-feet off the ground. I was surprised I even made it up. When I got on the simulator, the main instructor, Cody, kind of smiled and said something like, “So you want to ride a bull?” I said, “Yes sir, I do.” He said, “Well, you came to the right place.” With that we started doing drills to get us ready.
We ate lunch and continued drills through mid-afternoon. About 2:30pm, a decision was made to let those who had ridden bulls before take their first real bull ride of the class. Eight guys rode on day one. One guy got hung-up in the rigging and another got stomped on so many times it literally ripped his shirt sleeve and pants off of his body. This guy did not show up for class on day 2. As I watched this happen, I was positive that I had out-kicked my coverage on this adventure. I was terrified. After the riding was done, we went to the film room and Cody, the main instructor, critiqued each ride. As I watched these guys who were experienced riders get the ever-living crap beat out of them, in slow-motion mind you, panic and fear began to manifest in my body. Over and over I thought, “Oh no, Chris. What have you gotten yourself in to….” I was scared.
We broke class about 730pm, and I headed back to my room at the Doubletree. At the Doubletree, they give you a warm cookie at the front desk. I shy away from carbs, but on that night, I needed that cookie. Later on, I ate dinner and made it to bed relatively early. I went to sleep full of dread and fear.
I woke up the next morning at 6am. Usually I avoid Facebook from the last week of May until July. As I said earlier, it was the week prior to Memorial Day that Ellie’s cancer diagnosis was confirmed in 2011. As you know, on Facebook it brings up all of those old posts. Seeing those pictures, and reading those posts of the first few days of Ellie being diagnosed and treated reignites some very powerful feelings and emotions. I don’t like to go there. On this day, it was a picture of Ellie smiling and giving the thumbs from her hospital bed. Seeing that picture gave me courage I badly needed. As I drove over to the arena, I kept thinking about that picture of Ellie. 10-years old, about to go into a surgery room where she would receive her first chemo treatment and get a port implanted in her chest for future delivery of chemo. I kept repeating, “Be courageous,” over and over in my head. Fear can intimidate or motivate. On this day, I choose motivate.
Class started that day with more drills on the simulator. One of the most important drills we practiced was the dismount. L.A.F. Look, Arch your back, Follow-through. That’s all you need to know to get off of a bull, unless things go wrong. As I would soon discover, most of the time, things go wrong.
It was about 11am when it came time for us to take our first ride. I had several conversations with the instructors. They knew my goal was not to become a rodeo competitor. My goal was simple; One ride. I got my bull rope and put on my vest. I made my way to the area where the riders were staged for bull assignment. Cody called us all together and we prayed for safety. Folks, riding a bull is incredibly dangerous. This is even more true for beginners. I’m not a real religious person, but I took that prayer seriously. For good measure, I also tossed in the same prayer I have done for years prior to every take and landing when I fly. I speak a little more about religion at the end of this story.
Almost instantly, Cody and I locked eyes. He said “Chris, yours is the longhorn with spots in the alley.” I picked up my gear and made my way back behind the chutes. I felt like I was being marched to a firing squad about to face my death. Already that morning I had seen multiple young men in top shape limping or being carried out of the arena. No sooner did I get back there, when Cody told me to go back. He changed his mind and was going to assign me a different bull. Oh, and let me clear something up real quick; Just because this was a school, do not think they brought out any baby starter bulls. The stock we were riding is the same stock they use in most rodeos. They do this intentionally so the students will know exactly what awaits them when they enter a real rodeo.
I waited for about 25-minutes when I heard Cody say, “Where’s Chris?” I said, “Right here, sir.” He said, “You’ve got the big one in chute 5.” I grabbed my bull rope, glove and helmet and shot off behind the chutes. When I got to chute 5, I climbed up on the walk behind the chute. Cody was right. The bull in chute 5 was enormous and had big horns. My stomach came up into my throat. My mouth was bone dry. As I stood over the bull, looking down in the chute, there did not appear to even be room for my legs. Another instructor, Lee, was assigned to help me get mounted on the bull. Lee told me to hang on a few minutes because they were having some problems with the bull in chute 4. Once the rider was on the bull in chute 4, Lee said, “Okay Chris, remember your training. It’s time for you to be a bull rider.” As I started to climb the railing, life began to move in slow motion. I was completely filled and over flowing with fear. My entire body was numb. When I made my way over the railing, I touched my boot to the bull’s back to let him know I was coming aboard. The instant I touched him, he started kicking and jumping up. My reaction was to go back over the railing, but Lee said, “No Chris. You get on that bull’s back.” My brain was screaming, “Don’t do it,” but I just kept going. I crossed the top rail again and I was dangling above the bull using the walls of the chute to keep my weight off of the bull. I was trying to create space between the chute walls and the bull for my legs. Again, Lee said, “Chris, you sit down on that bull. You’re fine.” I just plopped down and some way my legs squeezed in between the bull and the walls of the chute. I had sat there for a minute or so, when Lee leaned in and got real close to my face and smiled. He said, “Chris, if you don’t breathe you’re going to pass out buddy. Just relax.” I was so scared. Over and over in my head I thought about that picture of Ellie. I kept telling myself, “You can do this. Fear is just an emotion. Don’t quit!” I also rehearsed my training in my head; feet in front of the rope, chin down, look down at the bull’s back, chest out, back arched, elbow up and forward, lift on the rope, stay out in front and drive forward. When I heard the gate open behind me, Lee said, “Okay Chris. It’s time to go.” Lee picked up the tail of my rope. I heated the rope with about 4 or 5 pulls. I then called, “slack” and lined up my bull rope just like they told me; Pinky goes down the middle of the back. Even though I am left-handed, I rode with my right hand because of a rotator cuff injury. I then told Lee to, “Pull.” He cinched it up tight and asked me if it was good. I nodded, yes. With that, I pushed my hand deeper into the rigging and wrapped the rope behind my hand and back around and through my palm. I tossed the tail of my bull rope back behind me. Even though the voices inside of my head were screaming for me to stop, I just kept going. I closed my hand and locked my thumb over the top. I was now completely attached to a 1200-pound bull. I slid my feet forward, positioned myself up over the top of my rigging. When I did this, I felt the entire bull tense right between my legs. He was an experienced bull, and he knew this was a rider’s last move before the gate opened. I stuck out my chest, looked down, nodded and then the gate opened. War between me and that bull had officially been declared. The instant I saw the gate move to my right, the entire world went silent and began moving in slow motion. Yes, I was filled with fear, but I was ready to fight. I stayed in control during the bull’s first jump, but after that, I am not exactly sure what happened other than the next thing I know I’m about 10-feet off up in the air and I land on my back. I hit directly on my right hip. I guess you could say I half-assed it. The impact between me and the ground knocked every bit of air out of my body. Even though I couldn’t breathe, I was not going to hang around in that arena. I was scrambling on all fours and shot up a fence gate to safety. My coach, Cody, came up behind me and pried me off of the fence. When we locked eyes, he was grinning at first. His expression suddenly changed to concern and he reached up under my vest and grabbed the front of my jeans and said, “You’re okay, Chris. Just breathe. You’re okay.” I guess he could tell by the look on my face I couldn’t breathe. Pulling out my pants a little gave me a more room to breathe. After about 15-seconds of this, a smile returned to his face and he said, “Way to go Cowboy. You did it. You’re a bull rider.” All of the people who were there, both students and spectators, started clapping for me. I was proud of what I had just accomplished. I honestly could not believe that I had just ridden a bull. When I got outside of the gate, the guys gathered around me to shake my hand, give high fives and pats on my back. I did not realize how bad I was shaking until someone handed me a cold bottle of water. It was all I could do to get the bottle opening in my mouth I was shaking so badly.
It took about 5-minutes to compose myself, and then I shot the family a text saying I was okay. Even though my bull ride had truly only lasted about 3-seconds, I could now officially say – Ride a Bull – CHECK.
That’s the official end of the story, but here’s a few side notes you might find of interest.
On the night before my ride. I seriously thought about going home and not doing it. I thought about it long and hard, but then I knew if I didn’t ride the regret would haunt me for years. When I was about 8, I failed the swim class at the YWCA because I wouldn’t jump off the diving board. I know I disappointed my Mom. More than 40-years later, the regret is still there. My inability to jump that day perhaps is why I am where I am doing what I do today. Maybe it was a blessing.
I had a serious discussion with myself the night before my ride. I asked myself if I was really okay with dying. My answer was yes. I have had an awesome life; Especially the past few years. Besides that, if I die, my family becomes millionaires. A concern I did have was what if something happened like I was paralyzed. One thing I know for sure is that I will never be a burden to my family.
Fear is just an emotion. Handle it just like any other emotion. Learn to control it. Yes, the danger might be real, but stay calm and work your way through it. Being courageous is finding the strength to do something, even though you are filled with fear.
Never let the facts get in the way of a good story. The bull I rode was truly a behemoth, but that was a good thing. Bucking bulls are athletes. My bull was kind of like me; overweight and older. I decided to name the bull I rode Dial 91. As in, this definitely isn’t going to end well so let’s get completely ready to call the ambulance. Actually, Cody picked that bull specifically for me. He didn’t want me to get hurt. Yes, Dial 91 was big and extremely powerful. My chances of staying on that bull for eight seconds was about 0%. But, because he was older, once I was off of his back, he just wanted to get back in the pen and eat. Those other bulls have a 2-step program. Step 1. Toss you off on the ground. Step2. Use all remaining strength to try and murder you. I am not joking. They are nuts! Killers!
Even when the odds aren’t in your favor, expect something great to happen. Also, it’s all about offense. People who successfully ride bulls do so because they take the fight to the bull. I tried, but I was late out of the gate. Use these principles in life and I promise you will have better outcomes.
Things aren’t always as they appear. Most people think that the business end of a bull is his head. Not true. The safest place to be on a bull is on his back and as close to his head as possible. The power of a bull starts right behind his shoulders and the further back you go, the more powerful he becomes. The worst injuries this weekend came from being stepped on, not being gored by the horns. Also, the bullfighters aren’t there to protect the riders. They’re hired by the stock contractor to protect the animals.
In bull riding, the position from which you start is called Home Base. There is a system involved in riding a bull. If after each buck, you follow the system and return to Home Base, you can ride any bull. Over and over, we reviewed the system you use to return to Home Base. Just follow the system. Wow, that sounds familiar as it’s applicable to business as well.
F.E.A.R. Acronym – “F” Everything And Ride. Your choice what word you fill in for the “F”. Nike was right when they said, Just Do It.
As I said earlier, I am not a real religious person. I do 100% believe that there is a higher-power in the Universe. I also believe in Jesus. I believe this because I read the book, remember? The 2nd night of the school, Cody gave a speech about his religious background and the importance of being a good person. I enjoyed his message. Folks, if you ride bulls, you had better be right with God because I assure you that you need all of the help you can get. I see my belief in a higher-power in the Universe like this; The root of religion is really based around treating others well and being a good person. What’s wrong with that? If in the end I find out that all religion is just a hoax well, so what. That’s okay with me. At least I tried my best to be a good person. Now on the other hand, let’s say it isn’t. Well, I’m still not sure I will have enough credit to get in, but I know that my sister Kelley will have plenty of leftover credits so maybe I can borrow a few from her.
My hope for you is that you get the chance to live like you were dying. That’s not a bad thing because the reality is that we’re all dying. As I said above, nobody’s getting out of here alive. You only get one life, so do it all. I do the stuff I do mainly to inspire my family. I want them to believe that there is nothing that they can’t accomplish. I also want to inspire others to step outside of their comfort zone and experience real growth. I want them to find courage and confidence. So, believe in yourself, Find your adventure and Live Your Life.
PS – Do I plan to ever ride a bull again? The answer is yes. I will ride a bull again. I know I said for several days after my ride that I would never ever ride a bull again, but I changed my mind. On the day I rode, I truly did my very best. Now, I am 100% sure that if I trained and gained more strength, I could do better. In closing, I’ll not say The End, but rather To Be Continued.
Thanks for taking the time to read this post.